Admitting a problem is the first step towards a cure

Last night I began the slow process of starting to catalogue my yarn stash on Ravelry. By this I mean I opened the door of the spare bedroom, pulled the nearest half-dozen representatives of my yarn stash out and realised that this barely touched the surface of my collection.

BUT I figure that even if I only photograph one yarn a night and list it on Ravelry, I will eventually come closer to my goal of acknowledging what I have and working out what I want to do with it all. Knitting from the stash instead of buying more yarn, is probably a good first step!

While photographing the yarn, I made another discovery. Our clunky digital camera which was state-of-the-art five years ago, has less resolution than the average pre-paid phone camera today. Now I know a poor workman blames his tools and I don't think anything will make me a great photographer but I've resolved to put aside the money I would otherwise spend on yarn towards a new, slimline and more powerful digital camera. Standards keep rising and new technology comes out every day, but I think it is time to update.

Catalogued to date:

• 1 skein/50 grams purple Bamboozle (bamboo/cotton yarn) received in tea cosy swap
• 1 skein/100 grams purple/green Noro sock yarn bought via the Australian Knitters' Board bulk order
• 1 skein/200 grams Russet (reddy brown) 12-ply Bendigo Rustic wool received in exchange for a ridiculously long Addi needle that I never used
• 11 skeins/1100 grams Petrol-coloured (greeny blue) Cleckheaton Merino Spun yarn bought at Cleggs sale last week ($3.95/ball - down from RRP $7.95)
• 6 skeins/300 grams purple/pink Mondial Bizarre yarn bought from Tapestry Craft clearance sale ($5/ball - down from RRP $13.85)
• 15 skeins/750 grams dark green and white fleck Cleackheaton Snowlflake - gift from non-knitting friend
• 2 partial balls (maybe 80 grams) blue and white fleck Cleackheaton Snowlflake - gift from non-knitting friend

Stashdown:

• Melbourne goth/emo scarf using 200 gram hank of JJ's Montage wool in Blackberry. 31 stitches in mistake rib (Every row *k2, p2* repeat to final 3 stitches, k3) on 5.5 mm needles. Unfortunately the colour ran a bit so my bamboo needles have a dirty grey tinge to their tips. Great colours, though!
  

Deafness is no impediment to knitting

I really haven't had a good last couple of months.  I've just spent most of the Australia Day weekend dealing with a major ear infection.  J took some really gross photos of the yellow stuff coming out but I won't inflict them upon any readers who stumble upon this blog.  The good news is that the antibiotics seems to be finally winning.  The pain subsided in time for me to enjoy a traditional Australia Day BBQ - complete with gourmet lamb and rosemary sausages - with our friends.  The bad news is that I am still completely deaf in my right ear. I'm assuming this will be only a temporary inconvenience.

In knitting news, I did a test knit and felt with the New Zealand mohair yarn.  I was a bit worried as it was only about 80% animal product but it seems to have worked.  My test swatch (knitted on 7.5mm needles) shrunk about 18% (after about 3 cycles in the washing machine), which was less than I expected, but at least I have a fair idea of what to expect.  Now to decide upon a pattern.

I've knitted just over a metre of the Melbourne goth scarf; it's been a very easy knit and if anything the yarn has softened with use.  It's not merino-soft but it's certainly fine for a scarf.  I've been advised that true Melbourne goth colours would be blood-red and black, but last time I looked there were plenty of black and purple-clad white-faced black-haired youngsters hanging around Flinders Street Station.  Maybe I should rename it the Melbourne 'emo' scarf. Whatever*

Speaking of merino, somehow 11 balls of 'petrol' (dark greeny blue) coloured Cleckheaton Merino Spun jumped into my backpack at the recent Cleggs (no website) sale.  It was a great bargain ($3.95/100 gram ball, marked down from $7.95) and I love the colour but I'm already wondering about the wisdom of the purchase.  It's a very bulky wool (recommended needles are 6mm), so while it will be a quick knit, I don't think it will make a very flattering jumper for someone of my size. Also, while it is 80% Merino wool, I'm not so sure about the 20% acrylic.  I guess I'll knit a sample swatch and try out a few stitches before deciding what to do with it next.

Belated resolution for 2008. Catalogue my stash on Ravelry.  Hopefully this will help reign in my yarn-buying tendencies.  And I might even be able to flog off some of the unwanted stuff to other knitters.

*Gen-Y speak for 'Bite Me'

Melbourne goth scarf

I was never a goth (too blonde hair and too fond of daylight hours, although I do have the white skin even without make-up) but I've always secretly loved goth fashion. It's timeless. The goths in Melbourne today dress exactly like the goths I knew back in the 1980s who apparently dressed exactly like their 1970s counterparts.

Earlier this year I purchased some Blackberry JJ's Montage Wool at Tapestry Craft's 20% off everything sale. The colour is very goth and very Melbourne - rich dark purples and blacks and greys. The wool itself is a little tough and scratchy but I decided it would be fine for a scarf.

From experience I know there is little point doing cables on dark variegated yarn - all the detail is lost. So it's just a very simple, 'mistake rib' pattern, perfect knitting for my travels to and from work. (31 stitches on 5.5mm bamboo needles; Every row: *k2 p2* repeat - k final stitch).

Tempted as I am to keep the scarf for myself, I will probably pass it onto a friend who even though she is in her 30s and a mum still clings to her black and purple clothes and make-up. It would be cruel to deprive her. And I wouldn't want to wear the scarf myself if it was covered in her drool.

Lollipop socks finished

Yarn: Opal 6-ply
Needles: 3.0mm Addi DPNs
Own pattern: Toe-up; 56 stitches, plain foot, 2X2 ribbed calf.

In retrospect, I made these too large for my feet - but they are warm!

Giving in to temptation

I am going to have to ban myself from the knitting social network site Ravelry; it is seriously detrimental to my financial health and is sabotaging all my attempts to declutter and resist materialism.  There is too much temptation as every single yarn sale in Australia (and beyond) ends up being posted there.  I can't knit as fast as I acquire yarn. I bought another six balls of Mondial Bizarre (regularly $13.85, on sale for $5 at Tapestry Craft) yesterday – with the encouragement of J.  The most mind-blowing thing was when I googled for images of the yarn (because I wanted to see larger pics of the colourways) the very first image that came up was a scarf I had knitted up last year out of the yarn.  I couldn't believe the picture on my little blog was ranked ahead of the company's own website or the many stores that carry the yarn.  It kind of freaked me out.

So anyway, I bought 6 balls of the purple/pink colourway which undoubtedly will become a hat/scarf set for me.  If I ever get to it.  Firstly I have to start (and finish) the Bag Lady swap bag (and no I haven't yet done a test knit/felt...) and then I have a couple more started UFOs to consider. The good news is that I am one cast-off row from finishing the Lollipop socks, thanks to some determined focussed knitting in front of the TV/DVD player and at lunchtime at work.  Pics to follow shortly...

Back to normality...

The temperature has dropped below 35 degrees, I've returned to work and the gym this week and re-discovered how to turn a sock heel.  Life is back to normal.  I like it this way.

I would like to say that my blogging slackness has been due to an excess of knitting or even vast amounts of time spent of Ravelry.  The latter is a little true, but the biggest time waster has been a deceptively simple "match-three" computer game bought over summer.  (Google 'Big Fish Games' if you are interested in cheap, addictive computer puzzle games; you can try virtually all of them for an hour for free before deciding if you want to buy; I spent more than six months just playing free trials before deciding to part with some cash).  I reached level 99 last night - I'm hoping once I crack the final level, I will no longer feel so compelled to sit at the computer clicking away.

I am now over half-way through my second Lollipop sock - the heel is properly turned with no holes - in fact I think it is the best short-row heel I've knitted to date.  I now have the tediousness of ribbing K2P2 the entire leg.  I hate ribbing but for me at least it provides the best and most comfortable fitting sock and the pattern is so simple that I can't stuff it up; I know I will love wearing these socks once I've finished and I know have less than one half a sock to go and because I'm knitting in one of the self-striping yarns it is fun to play the game of knitting "just up to the end of this patch of colour... well maybe to the end of the blue section, etc".

After I finish the sock, I have to start on the bag I am committed to making for the Ravelry Australian Knitters Bag Lady swap.  The organisers have kindly matched me up with someone else who also likes purple and I STILL have a heap of purple/pink mohair in my stash.  So providing the eczema stays away, I'm thinking of  doing a test knit/felt swatch with this (hey, there is a first time for everything). 

I don't get it...

Imagine you were in charge of an island that was home to a world-famous little penguin colony, the largest seal population in the Southern hemisphere (that has been rescued from the brink of extinction) and an important koala conservation centre. Hundreds of thousands of people visit each year to enjoy these features plus pristine beaches catering to both families and surfers. What do you think would be a good attraction to augment these features?

Some idiot decided that this would be the perfect location for a motor racing circuit...

Fortunately there were no races on when J and I visited; however the tacky discount souvenir shops and Grand Prix merchandising stores have moved into the main township of Cowes.

J & I were staying at the opposite end of the island at a gorgeous B&B. Smiths Beach was mere seconds from our back door, a short walk down the dunes. It was a bargain 'last minute' accomodation deal from wotif.com; 5-star views and location for a 3-star price. We had a great time doing all the usual touristy things (penguins, seals, koalas, walking on the beach, eating...); the perfect end to my 5-week break from work.

ADHD Knitter

I've been a bit all over the place in terms of my knitting the past few weeks and slack with my blogging. Nothing particularly wrong; just the holidays and the lack of structure that comes with them as well as Melbourne's foray into the very hot summer climate territory (we hit 40+ on a few days). I can't seem to concentrate on anything.

The above is a partial demonstration of what I've achieved.
1/ Cast-on and managed 1 1/2 pattern repeats of the Swallowtail Shawl (the hot pink yarn). Have ripped back the next row at least 3 times. Will try again when I have enough sleep and it isn't so hot.

2/ Cast-on and began second lollipop sock. All went well until the the heel-shaping where I seem to have forgotten how to pick up the short-row stitches without creating holes. Need to re look-up technique but can't get up enthusiasm for this at the moment.

3/ Purchased a "Frilled Lizard" sock kit at the Sunday craft market at the Arts Centre. Wool is unbelievably soft, very lightly spun, 95% merino/5% angora and totally unsuitable for socks. Spend half-an-hour on the internet working out how to convert grams to ounces and discover that yes, I have enough yarn to make the February Baby's jacket in Elizabeth Zimmermann's Knitters Almanac. (The fact that none of my friends are pregnant at the moment is irrelevant; the jacket will eventually be put to good use). Cast on but lose enthusiasm once I reach the pattern section. I can't seem to focus on even the simplest pattern without mucking up at the moment.

4/ Reading. Yes, I can still do this. Receive and read my copy of Crazy Aunt Purl's Drunk Divorced and Covered in Cat Hair in one sitting. It is easy reading, it is well-written; it is compulsively page-turning; it is a combination of funny and gut-wrenching sad (but ultimately triumphant). It has also been edited to within an inch of its life which means (on the plus side) it tells a coherent story following a normal time line but it loses some of the spontaneity of the blog.

I also read It's My Party and I'll Knit if I Want To which J picked up on the $5 discount table at Angus and Robertson. Again it's easy reading, a light-hearted, well-written personal but also well-researched look at the re-emergence of the knitting craze in Australia in the early 2000s. I enjoy it as I recognised many of the shops, groups and even individuals mentioned, but it is already slightly dated and probably of limited interest to anyone living outside the Melbourne-Sydney-Canberra triangle.

I've been doing a reasonable amount of non-knitting reading including Sophie's World, which is basically an accessible guide and summary of the history of philosophy. I wasn't expecting to find the book as compelling as it has been. But it is a slow read.

5/ Spending way too much time on the internet, particularly Ravelry. At the last minute I decided to join the Australian Bag Lady swap, which means I will have to finish at least one project this year. I also put up some unwanted acrylic yarn and two very long (150cm) Addi needles that I never use on the swap page and was surprised to find them snapped up in exchange for Bendigo rustic yearn, Opal sock yarn and some bamboo yarn.


J and I are off to Phillip Island tomorrow, so it'll probably be another week before I post again.

Medical notes (part 2)

The one thing you don't want to hear when you are being wheeled in for an operation:

"We aren't ready for her. We need to test the machinery; the first lot wasn't working."

Not surprisingly I sat up and told them to take as long as they wanted to test the machinery because I wanted it working perfectly before they started operating on me. I may have got a little bit on the hysterical side and they decided that it would be a good idea to sedate me while they were testing their machinery.

Obviously I have lived to survive the tale. Apparently my gall bladder was packed with stones. Unfortunately they couldn't give me the contents in a little jar due to infection control policies but I was assured it was an impressive sample.

They certainly turn you around quickly in our hospital system. Within 24 hours of being put under a general anaesthetic and having part of my insides ripped out, I was discharged and waiting to be picked up. Lord knows what happens to those people who don't have family and friends to care for them in the days after an operation. Plenty has been written about the problems of Australia's public hospital system; my experience was both better and worse than I expected.

The doctors clearly believed I needed my gall bladder out and scheduled my operation within a week of diagnosis, which is very impressive for an 'elective' (non-emergency) procedure. It made sound economic sense - if I'd had another attack of pancreatitis, I could have easily been back in hospital for another week using up scarce resources - but there are plenty of examples of people having to wait months for so-called elective surgery. The strain on the hospital resources, however, was evident every step of the way. I was originally booked in as a public patient but on the day I was admitted I was strongly encouraged to sign in as a private patient. "It's a way of fundraising for us," a rather desperate-sounding ward clerk told us. "We bill your health insurance company instead of the government. We waive all the gap fees, so it won't cost you anything or make any difference to how you are treated but it helps us out A LOT."

Well, as long as it wasn't costing me anything extra... and they weren't kidding about not being treated any different to the public sector patients.

I felt like I was on a well-organised but over-stretched conveyor belt, moving from one docking station to another. Every part of the hospital showed signs of wear and strain but the staff were unfailingly professional, knowledgeable and capable. They just didn't have the capacity to provide anything - time or resources - beyond exactly what was needed. The bean counters would have been proud. It was just terrifying to consider what might happen should something go wrong, should a staff member fail to turn up to work or a piece of equipment fail - there did not appear to be any capacity to cover any gaps.

A cynic might suggest that the post-operative ward was designed to encourage people to return home and not linger beyond their absolute medical need. 16 beds for patients of both genders - divided by curtains - with one toilet, one shower and two nurses for all to share. The nurses were kept busy monitoring our vital signs and dispensing medication. Most of us were on drips and sedative painkillers, which made even the simplest tasks a challenging process. At one stage in the middle of the night I was standing on the side of the bed with my drip somehow tangled in the side rail, desperate to pee and wondering if I should press the nurse button because I could see how stretched they were. (In the end I untangled myself but needed to call for help to get back into bed.) And I had it much better than most patients - my husband was there during the day and was able to help me change into a clean nightie and walk me to the toilet but he was not allowed to stay the night. I found it hard to believe the nurse who said I would be fine to go home by 10am the next day.

The next morning, the nurses unhooked me from my drip, gave me another dose of strong pain killers and showed off my scars to the consultant surgeons. Before I knew it, I was in the discharge chairs, waiting for J to come and take me home.

The doctors gave me a script for Panadine Forte, which left me sleepy but helped me control my pain for the first few days. J channelled his inner Yiddishe Mama and made me home-made chicken soup and jelly while I was recuperating. I alternatively slept, ate chicken soup and watched Babylon 5 on DVD while contemplating some very simple knitting.

A visit to my local GP confirmed that the scars were healing well although I had a very slight surface infection that we should watch. But even that appears to have cleared up now. I am feeling much better today, although I still cannot lift anything heavy.

J, however, has picked up a nasty cold that he is blaming on the visit to the hospital. Lucky there is some of his left-over chicken soup for him.

Stash busting projects

I've been a bit naughty, buying myself some early birthday presents including a lace-blocking kit and some 2-ply silk/wool Zephyr from Yarns Online (I am definitely going to try a shawl next year, maybe the Swallowtail Shawl) and ordering Knitting from the Top and Crazy Aunt Purl's book from Amazon. Then an old colleague sent me two huge bags of yarn for Christmas (mostly a blue wool blend from a Spotlight sale several years ago). The stash is getting way out of control, so I decided that while I was resting up from the op and needing some very simple knitting to keep me occupied, it was time to engage in a couple of stash-busting projects.

Item 1 - roll-brim hat

An adult-sized roll-brimmed hat knitted from some rainbow variegated yarn in my stash. Maybe 80 grams? Slightly thinner than 8-ply, knit on 3.75mm needles. I had no idea what my gauge was or how many stitches to cast on so I knitted this from the top down, using the figure 8 cast-on. I ended up with 112 stitches all around. It fits me well but yellow is not my colour. It will probably end up as a gift for a friend.

Item 2 - simple ribbed mohair scarf

My eczema had cleared up, so I decided to take my life in my hands and use up some soft grey/blue mohair-based yarn in a simple 4X4 ribbed scarf on 5mm needles. I cast on 34 stitches, slipping the first and knitting the last stich in every row. There were about 2 1/2 balls of indeterminate weight and size, more than enough for a 150cm (60 inch) scarf plus fringing.

Coffee plunger cosy

Maybe it was the stitch markers, maybe it was my eczema calming down to mere dry flaky skin, maybe it was five days of bed rest, maybe it was many hours perusing Ravelry but I finally started knitting again.

I've been looking at all the tea cosies and thought I might use some of my left-over Zarina to make a second cosy. Initially I thought I'd send it to my tea cosy pal but it ended up too narrow and more blue-ish teal than green. So it's ended up on my own coffee plunger. I made up the pattern as I went; a few rows of garter stitch with eyelet holes; a cable twist, then ten blocks of basket-stitch pattern, a cable twist and the garter stitch eyelet border. A nice and relaxing return to knitting. I'm now using some other left-over yarn to make a beanie.

As with every swap, a lot of people are going over the top. We signed up to make one tea/coffee cosy and send some tea/coffee and bickies. The number of people sending extra skeins of expensive yarn, mugs, multiple cosies, chocolate, dishcloths, stitch markers and more is a bit overwhelming. I feel like the goal posts keep moving. I wish there was a happy medium between the people who go OTT and those who pike completely.

In my package I included the tea cosy pictured below, some Fair Trade Earl Gray tea, a tin of Oxfam Ceylon tea, a packet of shortbread biscuits and some Clover DPNs (from the promotion kit I bought earlier this year). So my pal shouldn't feel too ripped off. I also found a nice card featuring Labrador puppies which looks like her sort of thing.



I think I'll pass on the next Australian Ravelry swap (knitted bags) but I have until the first week of January to make up my mind.

Cute stitch markers

I returned from hospital to find a package from the UK. Crafty Librarian, one of the organisers of ISE5 had sent me the butterfly stitch markers as a prize for a competition she had run on her blog. I pinched the photo from her blog as every photo I tried to take of the stitch markers came out blurry. They are even prettier in real life. Thank-you Charlie!

Medical note

Apologies for the long time between postings but for once I actually have a decent excuse. I've been in hospital for half the past week.

The story began when I woke up last Saturday night (or rather Sunday morning, 2.30am) with the most excruciating abdominal pain imaginable. I was lying in bed when it came on really suddenly and it got worse and worse and I woke up J and said "I have really bad abdominal cramps and I think I have to go to the hospital." J tried to get me to drink some water but I couldn't even lift the bottle. Then he said "Can you dress yourself?" and I realised I was stark naked and couldn't go out even to the hospital like this. So I staggered around trying to find my baggiest underpants and my loosest top and skirt.

J drove me to the local hospital which fortunately was only moderately full for a Saturday night. I must have looked as bad as I felt as the triage nurse gave me a trolley to lie on right away. I listened to J filling in the admissions paperwork. The nurse asked me to rate my pain on a scale from 0 to 10, with 0 being no pain and 10 being the greatest pain I could imagine. "10," I croaked.

It was a long night. Eventually I was pushed from the hallway into a little room in the emergency department. Various nurses regularly took my blood pressure and heart rate but it was a long time before a doctor arrived. I asked a nurse if there was any chance of getting any pain killers. Eventually I was given a couple of Panadine Forte for the pain and some other medication to settle my stomach.

The doctor when she finally arrived was nothing short of brilliant. She was so thorough that she picked up a couple of minor unrelated health issues, as well as diagnosing me with pancreatitus (inflammation of the pancreas). Once we established that I barely drink any alcohol (excessive alcohol consumption is one reason for this disease) I was sent for an x-ray and ultrasound. It turned out the pancreatitus was caused by gall stones and there are a fair few of them still in there. And the only way to get them out is to take the whole gall bladder out (it’s kidney stones that get laser zapped). The doctors claim that one can live a perfectly normal life without a gall bladder and the risk of complications from this surgery is much smaller than the risk of having an even worse and more dangerous attack of pancreatitus in the future if I don’t have my gall bladder out.

I spent the next day on a drip, eating ice, and two days on a clear-fluid diet to settle down my pancreas. Once the pain went, I felt fine. I slept and read and had visitors. J was fantastic, bringing me in fresh clothes and mint tea bags and ensuring I had a constant supply of reading material. And had my blood pressure and heart rate taken on a regular basis. To my great delight, I discovered that the few kilos I've lost this year and exercise have already had a profound impact on my health - I no longer have borderline high blood pressure; every single reading was well within the healthy normal range. On the fourth day I was allowed to have real food and when that passed without incident, I was permitted to return home to rest until the operation.

So on Monday I return to the hospital for the operation. It will be keyhole surgery, which means minimal scarring, and is apparently a very common and straightforward operation. Several people I know including my father-in-law and a close friend have had the operation and returned to a normal life. But any operation is scary.

I'm under strict instructions to eat a very low fat diet until the operation. The gall bladder stores bile which is released when digesting fat; It turns out that eating a slightly fatty meal after a month of eating a very low fat diet (damn J's birthday dinner!) almost certainly triggered the attack - as the bile was released, so was a gallstone. But with the number of gallstones I had, an attack was probably inevitable. I've had mixed reports about whether my diet will be restricted after the operation but to be on the safe side, I will stick to the low-fat regime. I need to loose the weight anyway.

So that's been my excitement for the week. I'll do another post about returning to knitting.

Indonesia's revenge

I don't know the real story behind Kopi Luwak, the world's most expensive coffee ($50 per cup!) made from coffee beans that have been swallowed and then excreted by the Indonesian Asian Palm Civet (for real... I couldn't make this up if I tried) but I would like to think it goes something like this:

One day a couple of poverty-stricken Indonesian locals were walking in the forest. They were particularly grumpy from a day of working in a hotel catering to rude Western tourists for a minuscule wage. One of them spots a pile of Asian Palm Civet excrement and says: "You know, I bet you that I can not only make those rich bastards eat shit but pay for the privilege too..."

EZ bargain

I'm very excited.  I received my copy of Elizabeth Zimmermann's Knitter's Almanac from The Book Depository today. This is an amazing UK company that ships free worldwide so I have no idea how they make any money.  But they are legitimate.  I had heard good things about them on the Melbourne S'nB email list so I swallowed my skepticism and placed an order.  Thanks to Australia's appreciating currency, the book came to less than AUD$9, which I suspect barely covers the cost of airmail from the UK. 

Three weeks later I thought I had done my dough as no book had arrived.  But the company responded really quickly to my email query, advising they had shipped the book by airmail 3 weeks previously and offered to send out another copy or refund my money.  I decided to wait until the end of this week to take them up on their offer as the post can sometimes be a little dodgey. And today Australia Post delivered!

So at least I've got some good reading until my hands are ready for knitting.

In other news, along with more than half of Australia I am celebrating the return of a Labor government that has already committed to repealing the most draconian of the workplace laws, signing the Kyoto agreement and apologising to indigenous Australians for ripping apart families and destroying their culture.  I hope they can make the next step of actually doing something to improve the health and life expectancy of some of the poorest and most disadvantaged in our country.

The election was so decisive that our former Prime Minister of 11 years actually lost his own seat.  The most senior Liberal in Australia is the mayor of Brisbane, Australia's third-largest city.  I'm glad the Liberals are out of power - this is the direct result of their own appalling decisions and governance over the past 11 years - but I'm not enjoying their self-implosion and decimation half as much as I thought I would.  I'm acutely aware that all countries, including Australia, need a strong Opposition.  We've put a lot of faith in Kevin07 Rudd.  Let's hope he can now deliver.

Scarf received

Amanda from the UK sent this lovely l-o-n-g soft scarf with cute flowers all the way from the UK. I would never have made anything like this for myself, but I love it! She also included some proper English tea in cute London tins and sweet sheep-themed accessories.



I am overwhelmed by her thoughtfulness and hope she received as lovely a scarf as I did.

Non-knitting news

I still haven't been knitting. I hate eczema.

My "not over-eating" project is going well; I've lost 2kg to date. On the one hand I'm overwhelmed when I think about the challenge ahead (10-15kg is just the interim goal); on the other hand I really feel that this is 'it'; a switch has been flicked inside me and I am going to lose the weight this time. It's not a case of want or hope any more; it's the certainty of knowledge.

Last night J and I found not one but two different poisonous spiders inside the house; a white-tail spider on my couch and then, when we were taking it out of the house, a wolf spider was found just inside the back door. We're still freaked out today and hope there aren't any more surprises hiding indoors.

Finally, here is a picture of my cat Smudgey looking very cute.

Summer has arrived with a vengeance

I'm going to have to change the name of this blog. It's 36 degrees Celsius, my hands are swollen and covered with eczema and I cannot conceive how I will bring myself to knit again until after summer is over.

Mind you, I knitted a woollen afghan in the burning heat of last January, so anything is possible once the eczema dies down.

I am SO GLAD I finished my ISE 5 knitting - my pal, Michelle, has received the scarf and posted pictures on her blog. My other pal has emailed to assure me that my scarf is on the way, she just can't face pulling out the iron for its final blocking (which is something I understand way too well).

My current 'project' is losing some weight, which I know is the most boring thing to write about. I lost a net amount of 7kg earlier this year and have plateued ever since. I have to seriously lose about 10-15kg more sooner rather than later. (I need to lose even more, but 10-15kg is the immediate goal). Last Thursday, I decided the best approach use the same technique I used for getting my finances under control. The reality is that I have to eat less calories than I burn each day, so I budget them. I'm determined not to waste my limited calories on 'crap'.

I'm not doing a formal diet as such; it's more a constant evaluation of "Do I really need to eat this? Am I really hungry? Where does this fit into everything else I’ve eaten/am likely to eat today?"

I’ve totally eliminated sugar and also all the diet drinks (because they can give me cravings) and am trying to focus on having the right number of portions of everything – the hardest thing for me is minimising the bread/carbohydrates. I’m also making sure I have a reasonable amount of lean protein because that fills me up, a couple of low-fat yoghurt tubs a day, lots of vegies and fruit. As far as possible I’m minimising the processed stuff. So although I’m being fairly strict, I’m being careful to make sure it is balanced in all the stuff I need. It’s not that I’m saying “all sugar forever and ever” is bad for me; it’s just I know I have to drop a reasonable amount of weight relatively quickly and this is the easiest and safest way to do it in the short term.

For too long I’ve been an emotional eater and it’s just not possible for me to be that right now; I’m trying to switch the attitude in my head, seeing food as fuel – emotionally neutral – and making sure it’s the right mix for me now.

I've survived the first five days and dropped a kilo; hopefully this eating regime, like my adjusted attitude to money and consumerism, will become habit and easier (and even enjoyable) as time goes on.

Yarn dreaming

I have to start knitting again. I had a dream last night about yarn.

I dreamt I was in the perfect yarn store. Every hank was a beautiful top quality yarn. I was gazing at and touching a gorgeous silk merino blend, that was available in the richest sea-blue and royal purple colours.

The prices were absolutely amazing and on top of all that, there was a 20% off sale!

I had plenty of money that I could spend guilt-free on yarn BUT I was walking around thinking "I don't really need any more yarn. I'm just enjoying looking and touching."

I'm not sure I want to know what that means.

I'm frugal, she's cheap...

(Knitting is still on hold; non-knitting rambling ahead)

I ran into an acquaintance the other day who had given herself a very bad home hair-dye.

"She was always cheap," I thought to myself.  "It doesn't look like she's even bought a decent home hair-dye kit."

Later I thought, "Who am I to talk?  I go to the hairdressers maybe twice a year.  Doesn't that make me as cheap as her?"

The answer, I think, is no, because there is a very big difference between being frugal or thrifty and being cheap.  At least when I go to the hairdresser, I go to a good one who puts in quality colour 'tips' (which last longer than an overall hair-dye job) and cuts my hair in a style that will last for months, rather than weeks.

When you are cheap, you buy things specifically because they are low in price, without necessarily much consideration of quality.  You sometimes avoid buying things you really do need or you buy a lower quality version than you really should because you can't bare to spend the money on what you really need.

When you are frugal, however, you carefully consider whether you really need to spend money on an item.  You question whether you really need it or if there is some way of adapting what you already have for what you need.  But then if you decide you do truly need an item, you buy the best value version that you can afford, which is not necessarily the one with the lowest price tag.  You consider quality and longevity over showiness and brand name.

Cheapness and frugality are attitudes and not necessarily linked to income.  And it can come out in the most unexpected ways.

We aren't the wealthiest people but whenever we visit a certain family, we always buy them a decent-quality bottle of wine for dinner, bought with their specific tastes and preferences in mind, rather than our own.  A few months ago they visited our place for dinner and as a hostess gift brought two little packets of Twinings tea.  The sort that are picked up in the supermarket for less than $2/packet.  Now I know it is the thought that counts, but given their income is at least four times ours, I thought it was, well, a bit cheap.

Later that evening I discovered just how much thought had gone into the gift.  I was making cups of tea and coffee and offered them the blackcurrant tea they had brought, thinking maybe they had brought it because they had a specific preference for this drink and thought we wouldn't have it in the house.

"Oh no, I really don't like fruit teas myself but I know a lot of people like them, that's why we got them for you. Tee-hee-hee."

"Bullshit! " I didn't say, but thought. "This was some unwanted tea in the back off your kitchen cupboard that you figured you could pawn off as a gift to your poorer acquaintances because we weren't worth the effort for you to go one miserly little step out of the way to buy something we might actually like."

Now that is really, really cheap.

The light at the end of the tunnel

Before

What are those strange stains on the worn-out carpet? On second thoughts, I don't want to know.

During

J repairing a bodgey floorboard. Note our books piled in the room behind him.

After

We still need to add a final layer of floor varnish, sand and paint the walls, decide what to do about window coverings (I am so tempted to leave them bare but we have to consider some privacy) and move everything back in... but there is light at the end of the tunnel!